20.10.09

incompletee .

i still feel blank .
idk what to do with mysefl & its driving me crazy .
some a yall prolly lookin at me crzy lol
like this bitch is soo dramatic .
but im so serious .
you take away an everyday necessity and you end up incomplete .
there's a cause & effect .
you take away brushing your teeth everyday
& what's the effect ?
bad breath & mouth hygiene .
lol .
not tha best example but understandable .
i been tlkin to james everyday for as long as i can remember ..
we met september 9th 2008 .
and we didn't talk eeeveryday ater that . but about a month later we
were inseperable .
if we didn't talk there was a real reason why .
he's my everyday dose of comfort and happiness .
he's something for me to give my love to & he receives it amazingly .
he gives it back graciously .
he's a blessing to my life , real shit .
and having to force myself to be without him is like torture .
like a itch you can't scratch .
i don't even think i smiled once today .
i just felt clouded .
i wanted to scream .
and i couldn't focus for shit .
smh .
i just wanted to go home .
& now tht im on my way
i just wanna sleeep .
i wanna do anything that makes me forget .
i was trying so hard today lol
& eveeerything kept reminding me .
first i was going thru my followers n his icon was in tha list :(
then when i was omw to tha library a
black maro pulls up ( he drives one lol)
then i was flippin thru my notebook
& there's "angelica ♥ `s james " drawn on a sheet
i wanted to fuckin cry .
i was like wtf man .
its like mann .
idk what to do .
im just like waiting .
but idk for what or how long .
im lost .
i just hope its worth it all . . .

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