he's really good to me . i know he would do anything for me and he loves
me but things fuck up & people make mistakes . that's life . just
putting that out there . . .
but anyways , today was my first day of school .
* sigh .
fucked up ass morning .
i got 3 hours of sleep .
i had morning sickness .
i left tha house late and had to halfway run to the busstop to make sure
i didn't miss the bus . then it rolls up .
and then im on it , with all these kids packed then a mtfcka but im like
okayy . this is how it was when i was in hs .
so then im ridin n ridin then i look up like where tf am i ?
i got on tha wrong fucking bus >:o
well TECHNECALLY , i got on tha right one but i didn't know it changed
bus routes .
it was 2 of tha same buses back to back and on stays the same and one
my dumb ass didn't know any of this n got on the wrong one .
resulting in me missing my first class .
so im stuck on tha other side of riverside for about 35 mins . times
just a tickin .
i finally get to skool . buy me a orange juice aand wait for my next
i was talking to this nice girl named shannon . she was sweet but yeaa
she's a little to square for my lifestyle .
she really into church n whatnot . and im not .
don't get me wrong ! church is cool . i believe in god . im just not
very very religious .
i smoke weed & have tha mouth of a 50 year old sailor lmao .
its not a good look . lol .
but yeaa . anyways . . .
soo today was a bittersweet day . more sad than happy .
as always .
me and my bf seperated .
yea =-o ! omg ! right . that's how i felt .
same reason as we broke up 3 months ago .
we live 40 miles apart . and he works a lot . & i have no car pluuus i
jus started skool so seeing each other is a pain in thee ass .
blah blah i heard it all before .
its whatever . I've learned aint shit what u make it .
you can make promises and say over and over how you want things to go .
but there's absolutely NO guarantess that it will .
that's life . and im soo over it .
im mad but im not . it is what it is . we were both unhappy bcus we
couldn't see wach other enough so i can't really force him to be unhappy
n stay with me just because i don't wanna be alone and single . its just
a title & i doubt very highly our relationship changes just because we
aren't "gf / bf" . we been thru too muchh .
now i don't have shit in my life but school . and that's still not a cup
of tea cus im missing 2 books . for 2 classes . ughhh .
gotdammit life is a pain n my ass .
i swear id trade in 10 years of my life just to see 5 years ahead into
my future .
just to know that i will be happy one day .
i dnt wwana fel how i do now in 5 years .
i doubt that very highly . lol .
but yeaa .
right now im feelin like fuck it .