i saidd i ' d tell yall waht happenedd .
basically -- nothinq .
i never qot what i was waitinq for .
i went back to sleep .
didnt qet any bcuss my crybby ass lil cuzinn was screaminn && hollerinn for over 30minss about some fuckin sodaa . thenn my cuzinns came over && qot dressedd .
me , i juss turnedd over && tryedd my hardesst to qo to sleep .
i had the most fuckedd up attitudee i ' ve had in the lonqestt .
i wantedd to sleep the dayy awayy to be honestt .
i madee it to about 6 pm . thenn tht wass it ,
i wishh i wouldve stayedd sleep .
i wokee upp to heartbreakk && confusionn .
im sinqlee i quess . idk why .
thtss somethinqq my bbyddy would have to tell you .
i dont know what to do with myself right noww , im too throuqhh .
all i can do iss just cryy .
im like lost .
i dont have anyonee to talk to about it . && he doesnt even wanna talk to me right now .
im juss likee --
what happenedd? what did i do wronq ?
im sooooo lost .
i feel so dumbb && naivee for puttin all my feelinss into it ,
bt at the same time i dont , cuz thtss how i feel .
ppl break upp && makee upp all the timee .
bt each timee we break upp itss scarier for me , bcuss i dont know if we'll qet back toqether .
the moree i lovee himm , the harder it iss for me to let himm qo . && the easier it iss for mee to tell myself , maybe itss not meant to bee . . .
bt i know that it isss . i KNOW . i feel it in my heart .
i juss dont know what happenedd .
i lovee himm . withh all my heart . i lovee him moree than mee .
moree than anybodyy could ever understandd . i couldd deal withh the seperationn ,
bt i cant deal withh losinq himm . lifee with out himm ain 't shit .
&& yeaa yeaa , i heard it all beforee , about how lifee qoess on && yuu movee onn . . .
&& yeaa i knoww tht , but im not readyyy . itss not timee for me to let qo .
i jus qotta see what qod throwss my wayyy .