19.5.09

you losee one , you gain onee .

so .
i ended things w. thaa ex .
i was just at my fed up point not to mention im just tired of thaa same
run around .
i realizedd that i didn`t wanna losee that other special someone dealing
w. his bullshit , cus i really likee himm & i know he reallly cares
about me . i knoww my ex lovess me despite what anyones sayss but i
guess it`s just not meant to be .

so im readyy for this new journey .
readyy for something neww .
not gonna jump straight into this realtionship
although its already been establishedd :)
i just wanna takee it sloww & not fck it up .
i got alotta love for him , i just can`t love him tha way he lovess me
, yet .
i said something reeally dumb lass nite tho , and i think he`s mad at me
. leave it up to me to fck off what im tryna keep :-/
i knoww this person is what i need right now tho .
i finallyy realizedd i need to stop chasing dreams & openn my eyes to
realityy , beforee it walks outta my lifee . . .

bt , on a diff notee .
my cuzinn is moving in to they`re new housee in riversidee tmmrw or
wedss & she said i can movee in !!
so yayyy me closer to a diff job market ! ahh yessss . i hopee i find a
mthfcknn jooooob ! wishh mee luuuck !

i`ll keep yuu guys postedd , yeaa ?
gnitee all :)

ohh && ps - RIP dolla , omg . i can`t believee they killed him , like
wtf . that`s sadd . my heart goes out to his family & friends :-/

1 comment:

Qu33n Kam... said...

Thats cool ur opening ur heart to somethin new. Alot of times completely being with someone new may show ur ex what he lost. He didn't really understand it cuz u never really went anywhere, && he figured ur never gona go anywhere. In his heart he knows ur still with him, but i feel like maybe he was using that to his advantage to go do what he wanted to do. Even when u post bout ur relationship no one really knows it like u do. SO its up 2 u to make that decision, its ur life. But I feel u only live once and the only person who knows what is the most best for u is GOD && honestly I dont think he will play games with ur heart by letting u stay around with someone who wasn't meant for u. Sumtimes we try to hold on to the very guy God wants us to let go of, we don't see, but just know God does && maybe he is saving ur heart from any more further torture it maybe going thru. BUt take it slow with the new guy but dont be affraid to love him, u know how now so just learn from ur mistakes wit ur ex. && there is nothing wrong with being loyal and stayin true but what is the point if he doesn't feel strong enough to do the same for u. U desrve to have the same love u wud give to someone. What is the point of going to the end of the world for someone if they arent gona meet u there...

if its meant to be it will be! U cant always have ur boat tied up at the dock u have to let it travel out to sea to see if it really can float.

[& i feel i just wrote a blog in ur comments lolz..sorry if that was too much but i say it cuz ive been exactly where u have & i feel the same way u feel about love]