september 30th.

you get filled up w. emotion and you jst wanna go off, or cry, or w.e
makes yu feel better after yu release it....me i confronted you about
how i felt. i cried so i have to let you know wht yu did tht pushed me
to tears....only after i jst expressed myself i feel like i jst wasted
my time..your time. i feel empty. i dnt feel cared about. i don't feel
loved. its like im set up on a one way track for heartbreak no matter
what. expressing myself used to make me feel better bt i dnt feel
understood. i talked for 20mins and i don't think you listened to
anything. you heard me bt i dnt think it made a difference. i guess i
just didn't find the love i thought i did. i dnt understand it. i keep
giving bt i dnt think your giving anymore...i feel like if i keep giving
maybe youll realize one day, damn she never stps loving me. this is one
n a million. bt you have realized it, im jst not the girl you want. that
should make you not the boy i want. i kind of dont. bt then i think abt
the love we had and i think why give up on that? HA. key word: had. im
giving up on love bc its nt bringing me happiness anymore. i wanna hate
you sometimes, and for split seconds i do. i can think of all the times
you loved me. said you loved me, showed me you loved me. then i can feel
all the times you hurt me. all the tears I've cried could probably fill
the sky. yet, i still love you. unconditionally. your nt a liar bt all
the promises youve made that you didn't keep are lies. well, broken
promises. and broken promises are truths that become lies. i still
believe in you. you jst dnt believe in us. we want each other to jst be
happy....isn't it funny how neither of us can find that? remember when
we used to be happy? those were the days...gone. i guess we have to keep
trying...im nt settling for unhappiness, im nt emotionally built for
depression, it takes me to places i dnt need to be. i hope you find
yours. and i hope you stop putting other ppls happiness before yours. i
stopped. bc i realized while i kept putting yours before mines. you were
putting hers before yours...which leaves no one to put me before theirs.
if im loving you, and your loving her, who's loving me? lol. im over it.
im over niggas. im over putting your all into someone else. im over
love. maybe it wasn't meant for me.

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